Our Core Disciplines
Every course in our curriculum has been meticulously designed by professors who have, through years of rigorous personal experimentation, achieved the highest possible levels of financial loss.
A rigorous introduction to buying assets at their absolute peak based exclusively on a cousin's recommendation and one viral tweet. Students will master the art of the all-in market order at 11:47 PM on a Sunday.
An upper-division seminar in the time-honored tradition of doubling down immediately after a loss to "make it back." This course covers emotional escalation frameworks and the psychology of "just one more trade."
A hands-on laboratory course focused on identifying assets in catastrophic decline and confidently entering long positions. Field trips to defunct exchange listings included.
Our most prestigious offering. Graduate-level exploration of 100x leverage on positions sized at 200% of net worth. Liquidation ceremonies held weekly.
A philosophical survey of holding through -90% drawdowns with conviction. Covers the crucial distinction between long-term investment thesis and denial, with an emphasis on the latter.
A high-velocity seminar in purchasing options that expire in hours based on vibes. Students develop fluency in the Greeks — primarily a vague awareness that Delta exists.
Dedicated to the Art of Consistent Loss
The Rektworth Institute was founded in the immediate aftermath of the 2008 financial crisis — not as a response to it, but as an institution that wished to replicate its outcomes reliably, at the individual level, indefinitely.
"Most universities teach students how markets work. We teach them how markets work against them — and how to remain confident throughout the process."
— Founding Charter, Rektworth Institute, 2009Financial decisions made under intense emotional duress are the most authentic expression of market participation. Logic is a crutch for the risk-averse.
Borrowed capital amplifies both gains and losses. Since we focus exclusively on losses, leverage is the most efficient tool in our educational arsenal.
Extensive market knowledge breeds hesitation. Our graduates trade with the supreme self-assurance of someone who has never read a balance sheet.
Learn from Those Who Know Exactly What Not to Do
Lost three inherited fortunes across four bull markets. Author of Buy High, Pray Higher. Holds a PhD in Behavioral Impulsivity from Rektworth itself.
Former prop trader who personally tested the "it can't go lower" hypothesis 847 times. Spoiler: it can.
Holds the Rektworth record for fastest account liquidation: 4 minutes, 17 seconds. Knighted by no recognized government.
Pioneered "narrative-based options trading," a methodology in which charts are ignored entirely in favor of vibes.
An Elite Opportunity for the Persistently Misguided
Enrollment at Rektworth is competitive in the sense that we accept anyone, but only the truly committed to financial self-sabotage thrive here.
- [✓]No financial background required. Prior financial education is considered a disqualifying factor.
- [✓]Must own at least one financial instrument. A brokerage account, some crypto, or a firm belief that a penny stock is "about to pop" qualifies.
- [✓]Demonstrate a history of emotional decision-making. A personal statement describing your worst-ever trade is the preferred application format.
- [✓]Disposable income, or better yet, non-disposable income. Emergency funds are considered unnecessary hedging and are frowned upon.
Rektworth Institute is not accredited by any recognized body and carries no fiduciary responsibility for any financial outcomes. By enrolling, you acknowledge that the house always wins, and here, you are not the house.